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  • Writer's pictureLJW

I Know Your Best Friend's Name

I love this quote, “talk to yourself as you would your best friend.”

After giving this some thought, would you tell your dear friend that she’s stupid, messed up, and could never get anything right? Would you tell her she doesn’t fit in, no-one really cares about her, or she’s a failure? For way too long, that’s how we have talked to ourselves. Silently, we have discounted compliments, second guessed and scrutinized our conversations in a group, or told ourselves just how much no one cares. It’s time to take a new stance on how we talk to ourselves.

Here’s a step by step way to do it:

First-for one day, write down all negative statements you catch yourself saying about yourself. Second-evaluate them in light of whether you would say them to your best friend. If not, then they have to go. What would the opposite or a positive spin on those statements be? Write the positive statements in a column beside the negative ones. Third-make an effort to heighten your awareness to negative statements. When they roll through your head, immediately stop repeating them, and replace with something you would say to your best friend. The more you do this exercise, the more you will catch it and eliminate negativity about yourself.

Here’s an example.